of words and limbs
by neverephemeral
Summary: Things would never be the same again, but where there was only only ash from the burnt land that was them, there was again signs of green. Clarke knew they were going to be okay. (Clarke & Raven friendship)


**There isn't enough fics about Clarke and her friendship with Raven. So, I decided to write one.  
I hope you all enjoy it!**

* * *

**"****I**sn't this the opposite of helping?"

Clarke shrugged, "we're keeping a slow pace as to not strain your leg more. It's not that much longer to the spring. Why," she looked at Raven, who walked beside her with the help of her cane and brace; which was still intact much to the annoyance of the girl and happiness of Wick, "are you in pain?"

"No," Raven replied.

"Do you want to turn back?"

Raven snorted, "hell no."

Clarke smiled and turned back to the path that they were walking along. The terrain wasn't exactly the best for those who were injured, never mind someone with a paralyzed leg, but they had been taking their time. Clarke was taking Raven to some warm springs nearby that the Grounders had showed them. She figured the girl would enjoy soaking in the water, maybe it would help with her leg. Sometimes Raven's leg pained her a lot, not that she would ever admit to it, but Clarke had noticed. Wick too had noticed and he had mentioned it to Clarke the other day.

Plus it was nice to spend some time with the mechanic. It had been too long since they talked. A distance had grown between them and Clarke knew it had been her fault. She wouldn't want to be friends with the girl who had murdered the guy that she loved either.

"How did you get the okay for this field trip anyways?" Raven asked.

"I'm co-leader," Clarke said.

Raven raised an eyebrow. Clarke sighed, "Bellamy is with Octavia and Lincoln at Lexa's camp. I told my mom that we would take our time and that it would save Wick's life if there was space between you guys for awhile." She looked at the other girl, "you needed to get away from the camp for awhile."

It was true. Clarke couldn't recall the last time that Raven had left Camp Jaha.

Raven nodded, "so didn't you."

Clarke glanced quickly at the girl before she looked away. She almost said that she comes and goes through the camp but knew that it wasn't what she was talking about. Clarke didn't have time for herself and when she did leave it was to go to Lexa's camp. Commander Lexa only really trusted Clarke, so she was usually leading the meetings between Grounders and the citizens of the Ark.

"And you're carrying a gun," Raven smirked, already knowing the reason as to why.

"Bellamy wouldn't let me leave the camp without one," Clarke said, "he knew I was taking you out."

"With our luck we would run into Reapers," Raven said.

"I don't plan on going into any mines," Clarke answered, helping Raven over a fallen log.

When they came to the springs, Raven stopped and stared for a moment. There was a large boulder, covered in moss on the top part. Underneath the boulder were flat rock surfaces and then, carved into the surface, were the water springs. There were four separate springs, the one closest to the large boulder the hottest.

"Who showed you these springs again?" Raven asked, as she sat on the flat rock surface and skimmed the water with her fingers.

"Lincoln and Nyko," Clarke answered. "Lexa told me about them and then told them to bring me."

"Of course she did," Raven scoffed.

Clarke frowned. She didn't like talking about the Grounders, especially Lexa, with Raven. It had become a sore subject for many but mainly her. She watched as a sorrowful look appeared on Raven's face as she stared into the water. She didn't want to cause her anymore sadness.

"Easy," Clarke helped Raven to bring her paralyzed leg into the warm water. "There you go."

Raven sighed as she placed her other leg into the water too, watching as Clarke stood in the spring and stretched her bum leg out.

Clarke, with careful movements, pulled Raven's leg through the water, making it straight before she bent it at the knee. She repeated the motion a few more times before she glanced up at the girl, "how's it feeling?"

"It's paralyzed," Raven said, "it's not feeling anything."

Clarke frowned as she stared down at the girl's leg. She wished that Raven could feel something in her leg, even if it was pain.

"Sorry," Raven sighed.

"It's alright," Clarke said, rubbing Raven's knee, massaging it with her hands.

Silence once again fell over the two girls. The only sound came from Raven kicking her right leg in the water, and Clarke, who still stood in the water, exercising the girl's other leg.

"Wick thinks I'm not resting enough," Raven said after a moment, "that's what we were fighting about... this time."

Clarke looked up at the girl, "I know."

"You know?"

"Wick talked to me yesterday."

Raven let out a frustrated growl, "damn engineer."

"He's worried about you Raven," Clarke jumped in. "He just doesn't want to see you damage yourself more."

"I can take care of myself," Raven snapped.

"No one is saying otherwise," Clarke said, "but everyone needs help sometimes. Including awesome mechanics."

Raven let out a soft laugh.

"What's going on with you two anyways?" Clarke jumped out the water and sat beside Raven, allowing her legs to remain in the warm water.

"Nothing much," Raven shrugged, "he's a pain in my ass."

* * *

Clarke shook her head and laughed. She wouldn't expect Raven to say anything less, especially when Wick said the same thing about her. They were amusing to watch that's for sure. Jasper and Monty had made bets on how long it would take for Raven to snap and severely wound the man. Octavia had made a passing comment about what their sex life was like. Bellamy and her took turns breaking up their fights.

"He chose me."

"What?" Clarke looked at her.

"Wick," Raven's voice had gone soft and she stared down into the water, "he chose me. Picked me because he heard about my reputation."

"One of his smartest choices, I bet," Clarke said.

Raven shrugged, "I guess."

"Raven-"

"What about you and Blake?" Raven interjected. "What's going on between our fearless co-leaders?"

"He's an ass," Clarke smirked.

Raven laughed and soon Clarke had joined in. Both of the girls sat on the edge of the spring, leaned forward and laughing. How long had it been since they did that? After a moment they stopped.

"What a pair we have," Raven said, "I have an engineer and you have an ass."

"Mhm," Clarke nodded, "we could do worse."

"We could be with a Grounder," Raven said, "pull an Octavia."

Clarke scoffed.

"How's that going, by the way?" Raven asked.

"She's happy," Clarke said, "they make each other happy." She began to play with her hands, biting on her bottom lip.

"That's good," Raven nodded. "And big brother?"

"Bell doesn't want to shoot him anymore, so that's good," Clarke said, "he's beginning to semi like Lincoln." She glanced over at the other girl and saw her staring at her. "What?"

"You called him Bell," Raven's eyes glistened with what looked like tears.

A small smile appeared on the blonde girl's face, "I guess I did."

Some more silence fell upon them. It was a different silence than before. The tension between them was still there but it was different this time. Clarke couldn't explain it. Something had shifted.

"Wick calls me Reyes," Raven spoke after a few moments. "He hardly ever says my actual name. Unless he's frustrated with me."

Clarke could see that she wasn't done talking, so she kept quiet.

"It's weird, ya know? How gentle he can be," Raven kicked her foot, watching the small wave it created. "The other night, we were in my tent and he had taken the brace off my leg. Because, Wick does that. He was rubbing my leg with his hands," she looked at Clarke and then back down at the water. "Which lead to him giving me a body massage. Again, another thing he does, body massages. It's not sexual, it's sensual but not sexual, ya know?" Raven let out a shaky breath. "Wick is just so gentle and soothing. It's different from..." she stopped and shook her head.

_Finn. _Clarke said in her head.

"The other night, it became too much," Raven said, "I don't know... I just, freaked out on him. I told him to stop treating me like a baby. I picked a fight with him."

Tears fell from her eyes and Clarke reached out to grasp one of her hands in her own.

"Hey," Clarke's voice was soft, "you're _not_ broken, Raven."

"What the hell does he want with me, Clarke?" Raven asked. "I'm partially paralyzed!"

"You are so much more than that," she squeezed her hand. "Do you think that's what Wick sees when he looks at you? Because it's not. He _sees_ how strong you are, how determined."

"How would you know?"

"Because I've seen how he looks at you," Clarke offered the girl a smile when she looked up at her. "He looks at you like you're the solution to every problem. He _loves_ you, Raven. _You_." She squeezed her hand again, "all of _you_."

"Bellamy's the same with you too," Raven added after a moment.

Clarke nodded but didn't say anything.

"Funny, isn't it?" Raven asked. "How we're both afraid of the same thing."

"Which is?"

Raven looked at her, "to be in love again."

* * *

Clarke shook her head as she turned to look at the water. Raven deserved to have love, she earned it. What had Clarke earned? Nothing. Sure she had gained a truce with the Grounders but she had to kill Finn in order to get it.

"Hey, Raven," Clarke could feel the knot in her throat and the tears in her eyes.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry," Clarke turned away from the water to look at her, "I'm so sorry."

"Clarke," Raven's own eyes had clouded with tears.

"I'm sorry," Clarke repeated.

Her body was soon shaking with sobs as Raven pulled her to her, wrapped her arms around her.

"I'm sorry," Clarke sobbed. "I'm sorry."

"Shh," Raven rubbed a hand up and down Clarke's side as the blonde buried her face into Raven's lap. Her body racking with sobs. "It's okay, it's okay." She leaned her head down, her forehead touching the back of Clarke's head.

_I'm sorry._

No matter how many times she said it, Clarke would never feel it was enough.

Clarke didn't know how much time had passed but she figured that she had sobbed for at least an hour. Raven let her, holding her as she did. She sat up straight, rubbing her hands over her face. She turned to look at the other girl and found her gently smiling at her.

"Hey."

"Hey," Clarke's voice hoarse from crying, smiling back.

Things would never be the same again, but where there was once only ash from the burnt land that was them, there was again signs of green. Clarke knew they were going to be okay.

* * *

**Thank you for reading! (:**

**-KT xo**


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